Life is a Dance in Progress.....Sometimes slow, sometimes a two-step, and at times even with glow sticks!

The year 2008 was in many ways a year filled with reflection, a year marking the end of one song and the beginning of another. Realizing that it had been eight years since I had separated and ultimately ended an 18 year marriage and squinting my eyes for a moment pondering the questions – “What have I been doing? And, “How did I get here?” Oddly enough this same time period also coincided with an 8-year political reign; however, that is not my focus. Despite what can perceivably be put off as political, societal, or economic blame, the power to wake up to the music of our life comes only from one place, and that place resides within each of us.

Most of 2000 was spent sitting on the sofa in the suburban jungle, a place that had become so familiar, dependable, and constant. I now faced a new reality of uncertainty and loss. Unfamiliar lyrics sounding through my head, the channel had been changed and was left wondering where my music went – accompanied by sad silent utterances, “But that was the song I knew.”

Back to that moment last year when I took a snapshot look at my life, most likely on one of those downer, bad radio play days and decided to journal just what the heck I had been doing over the last 8 years. The list of should haves, and have nots growing like weeds in my mind. To my surprise I had been dancing all over the place, to all genres of music! Beyond the country station melodies of life gone wrong, being done wrong or going down the wrong rode. I had been fully dancing with life.

My dance card had taken me out of one career and put me into another, and another and another. I fell in love. I'd sampled the cultural melodies of Spain, France, Italy, Mexico, Hawaii, Jamaica, and Grand Cayman with my trusted companion – the camera. My photography moved from hobby to profession, winning both awards and getting published! I purchased and moved into my dream home, Casa Milagro. I turned 50 and fabulous, went through menopause, and began working on two books. I am filled with so many ideas these days, I fret I may not get to them all. There was much more; however, my point in all of this only is to share the idea of reflection with you dear reader. And during seemingly stagnant moments in life, what radio stations call dead air time, to take a glance back with our own unadulterated eyes and sing a song of praise. This, not for purposes of egoic stroking, more as a point of rejuvenation of our spirits, the fortitude to take the next step forward, and permission to turn the music up loud and often, as life is a dance in progress.

A Sense of Ovulation

In June of '07, after returning from my glorious birthday trip to Paris, celebrating the 50th year of my earthly life, another milestone occurred - menopause! Hooray I thought - I have been praying this would happen. Having already fertilized two eggs, both harvested now to the ripe old ages of 30 something and twenty something, I figure it's time to retire from the egg making business. I swear all of my thinking about this brought it about - and frankly I didn't care how it got here!

Approaching almost two years of freedom from those monthly ovulatory board meetings, in the end which seemed to last forever with nothing ever going anywhere, maybe you can relate. And of course, there is a huge transition that comes with retirement. Sleepless nights, mid section weight gain, wee bit of the crazies. And what is with the broken thermostat?

So just when I think I have retired as C.E.O., "Chief Executive Ovulator" of my own factory, there is this familiar fallopial feeling that seems to come out of nowhere, a pang that catches me off-guard - AND due in part to the mental-pause I 'forgot' to mention above, I think..."what the hell is that?" Shortly after the senior moment passes, I remember the 30+ years spent on the job, dropping eggs every month, month after month, year after year, and I recognize that 'we' - me and my fallopian family are still trying to eek out just one more egg...with some automatic (no one consulted me on this matter) sense of ovulation!