I had an opportunity to get a change of scenery and perspective, staying overnight with a friend at his out-of-town parent's condo. I have never met his parents, however, after less than 24 hours I have come away with a real sense of knowing who they are. Some knowing of course comes from the the conversations we have had about his parents, spawned by my innate curiosity about people and the under-nurtured journalist within. Last night, however, my information about these people (I refer to them now as 'my people') came from the warm and loving environment of their home, the artifacts of their evident world-wide travels, the books on the shelves, their eclectic color and style choices for the decor, the easily missed inspirational notes and reminders unassumingly placed around the house – some no bigger than 1/2" x 2", and the double bed in their master bedroom supported only by the box spring base without a frame. This would be my room for the night and the first thing I noticed in that room was the bed. A double bed. So many questions and thoughts came rushing into my head I could hardly wait to put down my bag and start the inquiry with my friend about his parents, the people I had not met...yet.
The first thing I commented on when I came out of their room was that I noticed that his parents slept in a double bed, this in high contrast to my parents who not only sleep in large beds, but they also sleep in separate rooms from one another. My mom in her queen size and my dad in his king. He said that his mom only recently had commented on his own large bed, by sharing her wisdom of how making a double bed was so much easier. Which is true, I think I already said that. But here is where my mind really went around the wisdom and value of the double bed. If I am sleeping alone – why do I need such a big bed? If I am sleeping with the love of my life – why do I need such a big bed? The conversation I was exploring around the size of a bed had multiple layers. From the angle of materialism – bigger and more is better mentality, to other subjective matters around simplicity, love, and intimacy. There is plenty of room in a double bed to both snuggle and to find your own space if you need it. I love too that their bed was literally grounded and needed no framework...easier to get in and easier to make. Simple, accommodating, and unassuming.
But there is more. As I was brushing my teeth getting ready for a night in the double bed, my eyes darting about the bathroom vanity, I was intrigued by the abundance of inspirational quotes of wisdom dotting the decor. One of my favorites read, "You can't have everything. Where would you put it?" – Comedian Steven Wright. The notes soon led to scanning book titles. You can learn a lot about people just from that. I found myself surrounded by profound positive energy and a library of love. I know it, because I felt it...empathically. As I nestled in for the night, I was looking forward to absorbing the love and nurturing energy of the people who usually inhabit the room.
In the light of morning my eyes landed on a string of books just above the bed on a shelf. Literal soldiers of information. "The Four Agreements", "Why Sinatra Matters", "Strange Change", "The Playful Brain", "Behind the Beautiful Forevers", and lastly the one that put me over the emotional edge "Living Your Best with Early-Stage Alzheimer's".
I came to visit for a change of scenery and perspective, but not from where I expected. It didn't come from the urban landscape, the aliveness of the city sidewalks, or the usual visual stimulation that I dearly love. It came from the visceral place of a simple double bed and the people who live and love there.
